So ignoring my calls doesnt work if you update your facebook a minute later.
So there are ramen noodles in the shower you need to explain...
she asked if she could keep her bee antennas on during her mugshot. i love halloween.
I don't really want to write this paper. It's the last one of the semester - I need to savor the feeling of procrastination.
Just saw a cop issuing a DUI. At 3 pm. It's definitely the start of winter break.
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
My professor complimented me on the well drawn penis on my face then asked if I would like a seat closer to the garbage can.
He snuck out of bed at 9 am and came back with pizza and a bottle of wine. I think I'm in love!
After a certain blood-alcohol level, the dog is in charge.
I was crying hysterically and you wouldn't stop petting my ear and shushing me every time I tried to say something.
An image of us stuck like that like Pompeii comes to mind. A wonder for future anthropologists
Man. Apparently I blacked out between the 4th margarita and my air mattress. Asleep in my jeans at 10pm. Mom outdrank me again.
I got so high that I ate a protein bar while in the shower. I then proceeded to leave half the protein bar and the wrapper on the ledge in my shower. Haha oh well.
It’s like I’m living in some alternate wet dream universe right now
They tried to get you to drink water and all you kept shouting was, "NO MORE LIQUIDS OF *ANY* KIND."
Randomize
