Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
He dropped me off at 4 in the morning because I made fun of Pearl Jam..
you two really need to work out your issues. my vagina can't handle another week of your pent up frustrations.
I gave her at least chlamydia. Maybe worse. She is also into chicks and loves taking naked pics. It's like the less I believe in Jesus, the more he rewards me.
She kept telling me to calm down. I was on the floor with my eyes shut, not moving. In levels of calm I was one step above coma patient
Expect nothing less than me teaching them how to do shots and put condoms on
I'm assuming the reason my elbow is so sore has something to do with all the broken shot glasses eh?
Yep
Ok well hopefully you're not staging an intervention for me at your place because I'm bringing beers
I just got back to our room ....neither of us spent the night there but both our beds are occupied. send help.
I played "in the air tonight" on a drum set made of titties, and I'm not even exaggerating
To confirm, you are a grown ass man and you just asked me what her vag looked like.
i’m just listening to christina aguilera’s “your body” on repeat and trying not to pass out at my desk.
I have a to do list for the summer and thing one is figuring out my sexual orientation
I just had a drunk lesbian experience.... How do I break it to my boyfriend??
We fucked, she finished, high fived me, the pulled a celebratory pack of gushers out of her purse for each of us. I'm going to marry your sister dude.
Randomize
