We even fucked WHILE he was making me breakfast in bed.
jack dropped his pants and said "bet u've never seen a dick this big." which was really sad cuz i had never actually seen one that small...you have like pinch it between ur thumb and pointer finger to give a HJ
Is it bad that your cum tickles when I swallow it?
I was so high I thought there were pigeons in my room. Long story short there are now donut crumbs all around my bedroom.
Here's the thing. I'm really high and have lots of questions about lightning.
i think the doormans mad at me
well we haven't pretended to pretend we were going to have a threesome with him for a while...
Some guy just rode an office chair down my street, I hope he comes back so I can give him my number.
Last night was so embarrassing. I got like almost blackout drunk and threw up in my hand and then blamed it on someone else.
I swear she is the Mary Poppins of drugs
He painted a swimsuit on me. Naked day at the lake was a success.
Woke up on my sisters couch, and it was like the start of a Terminator movie,my brother in law was passed out on the floor naked in the fetal position. We now call him Arnold. It was an epic night.
Nothing like walk of shaming to the bus stop in your bar clothes at noon and seeing the fire truck you work on drive past with the other shift giving you thumbs up.. Brotherhood at its finest
All I know is I woke up with my apartment door wide open, naked, and I poured an entire bottle of Advil on my bed to sleep in.
idk what to be more embarrassed/confused about, that i lost my underwear or that i woke up covered in fried rice
Stop saving videos when you’re using my pornhub account!!! My girlfriend just tried to finger my butt because she thinks I’m into that
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