I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
p.s. you have a small clit
YOU ARE THE MOST AWKWARD PERSON ALIVE.
Literally he has the smallest penis I've ever felt since 8th grade.
My boobs grew. They knew we were going to vegas.
She started ignoring us once we told her we were out to celebrate your abortion. Who knew strippers could be judgemental?
Somehow me not being able to breathe due to cocaine doesn't seem very domesticated.
Note to self: Do not bring gift bag with cock ring inside to family Christmas. Leave to unwrap at home.
My boss just called me for legal advice. What has my life become?
He brought me four big burritos and two joints! He can sleep with his bank teller any time he wants!
Lusting after Beyonce when you're a lesbian is like having a crush on Jesus. You just don't do it.
Is the mullet a good, great, or horrible idea before we leave for college
I can't tell if I have the Pizza Hut shits or beer shits
The guy at the rodeo just told me "if ya don't say none, ya don't get none". What the hell does that mean?
Im pretty sure you just got hit on by a gay cowboy.....
do you think there's enough of the fabric you gave me to make a crop top for a cat?
He kept screaming "I am the thunder!" when he was riding me.
Randomize
