Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
I think I'm going to start texting all the people that don't want to talk to me
i was so high that i was eating crumbs of my bed only to realize they were fuzz thingies. fml.
dude if Megan calls say you Sis was house sitting for me yesterday , she f'n found dana's panties
her last google searches are 'cheap african safari' and 'what does lion taste like'
I got really high with eric & scott.. they're discussing why words sound the way they do.. it's going to get messy
I'm going on a nature/throwup walk. Don't lock me out of the apartment.
i chased bacardi with meat sauce last night
I called my dad at 3 a.m. because I thought he'd be proud that I didnt get arrested. Daddys little girl at her finest...
It's not an office Christmas party until your boss confesses his undying love for your boyfriend...
It's funny that when I fall down as an adult I'm so much happier no one saw than that I'm not seriously hurt.
all i want in life is a shot and a cock is that too much to ask
They were assless. I wore assless football pants.
Kick open the door, strike a pose, steal a boyfriend, end scene.
I have so much to do, no motivation, and Harry Potter is on. You KNOW whats taking priority in my life right now
Randomize
