I'm on that like soy sauce on rice
dude. late night with jimmy fallon isnt even funny. the people in the audience there to see him dont even think hes funny.
kinda like you and your friends.
On a side note I can sing drakes “best I ever had” so good you’d think I was on degrassi.
You have to stop making references to your extense knowledge of 13 year old girl television programming for me to believe you aren’t homo. The Bravo line-up was one thing, but seriously
that shirt you're wearing that says "officially single" makes me think you'll be that way for a really long fucking time.
you could play connect the dots with the people ive fucked in this room
...i had to draw her a diagram of her own vagina. including a little arrow to the clitoris. shouldn't it be the other way around?!?
Yeah, you spent an hour in front of the mirror trying to reenact the Sailor Moon theme song.
According to last night if you on the sidewalk at 12 a|m\nYour a WHORE !
He came in, laid on our floor and started to make a snow angel.. On the floor. Then he just left never said a word. 20 mins later walked back in and dropped his pants, looked down and said "wow im happy i had boxers on."
sometimes i think my sole purpose in life is to cockblock my roommate
can you blow me for old times sake
only for old times sake
Cops do not care. One just laughed and said "precious"
No more morning sex. Just for once, my vagina would like to go to work bone-dry and bone-free.
Is selling savings bonds for acid money something a normal person does?
And now to play every stoner's favorite game: Where the Fuck Did We Park the Car?! Disneyland Edition!
Randomize
