if he's not good at sex i should be allowed to have sex with someone who is. that's a totally legit statement i think
did you fuck him yet?
hahaha who do you think your talking to.. a nun?
how did the keg end up in the top bunk?
You tried to sled down the middle of the street. In. Your. Coat. Of course you are bruised.
She wasnt impressed wen i brought a guy for her back with me, a 3am impromptu sperm donor is not a gd birthday present. Im a bad gf.
Ummm Im the uneducated alcoholic of the group... if I say its a bad idea, its probably a bad idea.
I just showered sitting down with a sippy cup of water in there with me. It took 40 minutes. That hungover.
No, he went to go get condoms. The least I could do was chug two beers before he got back
I CAN'T FUCK HIM OUTSIDE. THAT'S FOR PEASANTS. HE'S TOO FAMOUS FOR THAT.
I met her daughter,who I went to high school with on my way out this morning. She didn't seem to surprised. I love older women.
He ended up buying the equivalent of dinner at a Mexican place, in weed
He wasn't excited for the fifty shades of grey trailer, so I told him we're done
We fired a shoe out of a medieval cannon. I know not where we got either one.
You were peeing off the rooftop and told everyone sometimes you just gotta go
He just kept repeating "It was like meep meep meep on my balls."
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