she cant drink. allergic to alcohol.
ewwww. she might as well have a dick.
I REALLY appreciate you guys taking care of me when im wasted but i think its weird when i wake up in different clothes than black out in
Hey is it bad when your boss leans over your desk and tells you "you smell like the Rainforest Cafe"??
We just licked a sour creme and onion chip for salt for a tequila shot. Our vacation has officially begun.
I just got a whiff of tequila through the air conditioner.
2 classes, 3 finals, and $30 worth of adderall until this semester is over.
I passed out on the floor of a truck stop. Drinking binge 2011 is now over.
we just finished a porn and sex toy shopping spree. this is the fun part of "being serious"
She. Own s my pussycat. Roxk it like. The sun hitting the horizon
he came in the room wearing gloves & rapping while eating a corndog
knight in shining armor
There's green glitter on my nipple rings. #mardigras2013
I was proudly and successfully the first girl ever to get kicked out of a the bar for being too drunk last night. Loving spring break.
You and your dick were a topic of high regard tonight
I sent him a blank text because I didn't want to "drunk text" him.
He is married, and has a regrettably large penis. I need to find another one right away to get myself out of this mess.
How big does a penis have to be before it becomes regrettably so?
Randomize