doing washington apple shots with my mom. sunday afternoons suddenly got so much better.
You yelled "bananas are an excellent source of pottasium!"4 times in the middle of class. how do you not remember?
I don't even know what potassium is.
Weddings at vineyards should never be allowed to happen. I'm pretty sure I drank every bottle they produced in 2008.
But besides the pee thing, he sounds like a nice guy.
She told me she was going to ride me so hard i would cum the ghosts of my ancestors...its gonna be a good time
he just sent me a picture of his penis sticking through a piece of paper that he had drawn a stick figure with tits on it that said "you"
He got completely naked and is now just standee there next to my bed poking at my hamster. Why can't I get sex the normal way.
I'm approaching homosexuality at an increasingly alarming rate with each break up.
Moonshine marathon is never a good idea
It just makes me feel nauseous. And I don't want to feel nauseous when all I really want is to get off.
Last night was like blooper reel sex. He dropped me!!
that was the most beautifully crafted sentence ive ever read that involved the phrase "genitals or whatever"
He wants to buy me a wedding ring and pretend to be married to someone else when we fuck. It actually makes me wet thinking about it.
Sarah just give sum homeless dude a lap dance, took like 2$ worth of change from his cup and was all like, "Biiitch, this aint free"..
Gonna do a few lines then clean my room so I can feel like my life is somewhat in order.
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