3:40 am: you never wrote back on my facebook wall
Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
the roller ball on my blackberry is the closest i've come to touching a clit in 2 years.
The whole way homeyou were flapping your arms up and down, and when I asked why you said you were trying to tell Tony Danza about the angels.
great sex! but now the fight over who sleeps on the wet spot starts.
This got awkward about two "Oh yeah"s ago.
I just looked at all of our spring break pictures... there's a guy getting a blow job in the background of the ones on the beach.
i'm watching the draft and making cookies. how am i still single?
Defiantly just threw away our yearly bottle collection in front of the campus tour. The school should pay me for recruitment
He has crabs, not bed bugs. I recommend incoporating a clinic on this mornings walk of shame route.
It's official. 2011 is the year of sport fucking
I think that was him coming out to me. I just brushed it off
I just remember looking over and seeing you on top of him and us high fiving. That's when I knew we'd be perfect roommates
I don't know if I'm feeling really nervous right now or just extremely horny.
Pretty sure that I just proved those labels that say "non-flammable" wrong. totally unrelated, We just made your futon fly with a shitload of fireworks
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