Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
as we were driving back from the frat house he pulled down his pants and convinced me his penis "wanted some air"
Just spent the last three hours in the library successfully refreshing facebook
just went back to the bar and asked if they found a shoe last night.
I'm pregaming for my hair cut. Working two jobs definately taught me how to use my time wisely...
I'll have you know that I'm still picking duct tape residue off my wrist from sunday
This is John, I met you downtown last night.
Oh, ok.
This is the cop that kept you out of trouble last night
Cover your phone. Photos of streaking frat guys incoming.
Negotiating with my body. We're ok. Violent upheaval is not necessary.
I've grown it out to 70s proportions. I'm calling it my chastity pelt.
Hey, it's not my fault that you had a shitty bed frame that couldn't handle the rough sex you're into.
Yup, found the vomit in the side compartment. My bad.
Hiking for a first date sounded like a good idea in theory because there was absolutely no possibility of me blacking out. In practice, I'd rather black out than go through what I just went through.
that guy was staring at your tits.
nah, more like they were staring at him, and his girlfriend, and her less than adequate bosom. they pitied the fool.
point taken, oh mistress of the bosoms.
This chick just walked out of the men's room with molly all over her nose and her shirt half unbuttoned. She nodded to all of us and said "gentlemen" as she exited
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