Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
today he pulled me aside to show me a lawn mower that he drew above his pubes. I saw his pubes in all their glory. Right there. In spanish class. Hola.
He asked me to touch his mustache. Should I go home with him?
something had to give and with her weight the coffee table never stood a chance
just had to explain to the health center why i wanted 50 condoms a month.
I have a question: does pizza dipped in chili sound good or am I just really high?
idk. I was on the deck with Dominic and i felt something weird on my arm. I looked down and you were licking my elbow.
If you ever wanna get tagged teamed, army guys are pretty open to it. Write that down for future reference.
not now. havin a heart to heart with drunk fred flinstone
Well, when you bump into your parents at a swingers meetup, it's time to change cities
Meeting up with one of your students at your drug dealers house is always an awkward moment
First. I had the strength. Now. I am the death.
I haven't been single on my birthday for 7 years. If you don't get me laid tonight, your best friend/wing woman status will be revoked.
so apparently over the course of the night my roommate and i had sex in exactly the same spot. ps the downstairs sink needs cleaning.
I came twice AND he sent me home with edibles. I think he’s a keeper.
Randomize
