Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
i justawanted to let you know that illi aalways be thwew for ui and o qill waasag youer dog whenebvet u wsnt
Just think about it this way, every time you work Sunday, it's another $75 and that equals another hooker when we go to Amsterdam.
So here i am dipping ice cream in my vodka and watching the bad girls club on demand. This is not ok
My therapist is concerned about your alcoholism.
An hour ago, you were stranded out of state, and now you're getting laid? You are a god. Whatever you do, don't ask her name.
Dad was on the deck drinking straight bourbon. He stopped, puked on his feet, and then continued drinking and talking about compound interest.
I just had a fifteen minute conversation with a Raccoon by the garbage bin. I was feeding it chex mix.
Well you finally jumped into that tree you've always wanted into and some girl gave you an 8.5. You were very happy.
I was told to keep my leg elevated. I assume it means to keep my legs on the air, it's like I was prescribed to be slutty
Regardless of your intentions, deep throating a Twinkie is NOT sexy. You owe that poor cashier an apology the next time you pump gas.
I tried to have a quickie with him at the company happy hour. I think I need to quit my job.
A thong just fell out of my purse in front of my whole class maybe I should stop using this morning class as my walk of shame
And then the night went full on bisexual.
Just in case you blacked out, we had sex, you came in me, we need plan B, we fell off your top bunk, broke your roommates chair, i still like you, but i'm in pain and am going to bed
Randomize
