And now we're talking about squeezing babies out of vaginas...
He gave his mom his old phone, and I am SO paranoid
Did you send adult things?
Um. Yes would be the understatement of the year
Cuntadactyl. (n). A pre-historic dinosaur of Mandy-like features that is primarily identified by it's inability to play well with others and overall C-word demeanor. Physically, an unfortunate appearance.
the only reason why im excited to go home for break is to finally eat real fucking food and have normal bowel movements.
twelve hours since my last beer and i just blew a .08, time to go to the library
My valentine's day: watching The Notebook, and porn, eating chocolate, and ice cream. All while jacking off.
Wow... you've managed to cover all of the sad girl stereotypes that exist.
sex in a ball pit. and I thought ghandi did great things.
I just did the nutritional comparison between 2% milk and Bud Light Lime.. the beer had less calories, less carbs, and less fat. It's not looking good for milk in my life anymore
He invited you over for Super Sexy Saturday and Cosmos... I'm pretty sure that's gay
there has got to be a maximum amount of semen a person can take in before they get some kind of poisoning.
you know it's gonna be a good 4/20 when you start saving up for it in january.
Pants off. Spirits lifted.
The fact that it neither of us came up with the reason of "it's morally and ethically wrong" speaks volumes about this relationship
If someone plays phil collins i'm gonna take off my clothes
My drunk ass is being chauffeured around like the damn queen of England
Randomize
