You and i never got to the, we dont care what we look like friend-stage. you know? like not brushing your teeth stage.
sorry im really high
ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
I asked my mom if I was the drunkest one in the room. With 8 days till I go back to school, I couldn't care less about being shitfaced at a baptism
I Never golf you the sypdu of andrew. The one o will marry. The one j plwgded my last breath up. The one I pledged everything I live forbworh to. I love him more than life itself
Dude.. You paid a stripper $50 to listen to you cry last night.
i have learned 4:30 is too early to start pregamming for the midnight harry potter
I'm glad we are bonding over both contracting clamidya. Winners.
100%
So how much of last night are we going to pretend never happened? Enough to stay friends?
She said "I've been waiting to suck your cock since high school." I'm so glad so many freshmen are from our school.
If I pissed all over some chicks bed I would probably apologize for getting so wasted, not putting out, and turning into a god damn R. Kelly Cinderella... Not ask for coffee and a ride home.
Pretty sure I just became my mom's wingman
I'm really hot. went tanning and this cheeseburger shirt like isn't breathable
I knew I was in trouble when she kept referring to the next day as things we should do
So you brought her to my house and left her on my couch.
The dude is a cop how would I ever date a cop I wouldn't be able to talk about the first TWENTY-SEVEN years of my life!
I can't really feel a difference, so essentially I paid 60 bucks to bedazzle my vag.
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