my grandma just informed me that patrick swayze used to babysit my dads cousins why wasn't i informed of this early...like when i was obsessed with dirty dancing!
I'm pissed I'm finding this out at 24 bc i could have used this material to make friends
We followed the campus tour around in a golf cart drinking PBR and blasting "Sexual Healing."
I lost track of him after he threw the handful of pennies at the 2 female cops and ran into the darkness. I heard a tazer and a scream. All that is left is his flip flop. Its like hes drunken man-derella.
How unacceptable would it be to bar hop with a funnel in the square? It's Halloweekend and I plan on going hard. I can claim it goes w/ my costume. But I don't think the MIMITW uses funnels.
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
I told him to just roll me a blunt and put it in a heart shaped box.
God fucking bless the man who invented the vibrator. Bless him and all his descendants. I think I saw the face of God tonight
GOOD MORNING. Have you seen the Avenger vibrators?
Maybe I'm nitpicking, but that looked more like how one would jerk off an elephant than it did playing air guitar.
You peed on a pole and declared to a cop that it was your pole and yelled at him to not even look at it, and then yelled at all of us for looking at it.
The guy I screamed at across the bar for booing the Bruins ended up buying me shots I had to explain to him there's not a chance in hell I would ever fuck a Canadian! #Bostonstrong
Mid-fucking he screams "YOU CAN'T VOTE FOR TRUMP"
He's completely obsessed with his ex but gives phenomenal head. So overall, yeah, good first date.
am drunk, naked, and blow drying cat. need adult supervision
The covid immunization shot lady also sold me a mondo bag of really good pot.
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