If it makes you feel better he went down on me when i had a yeast infection.
Everytime I cough, my tampon falls out a little bit. Does this mean I'm loose?
I'm pretty sure this all started when I found a vibrator in my mom's sock drawer and had my first orgasm when I was ten...
The kid next to me is typing a powerpoint presentation.. title: Reasons to Wear a Condom, subtitle: The Ian Story
The first slide was titled: You Could Get a Girl Pregnant.
there is a dude in the bar with no arms getting fed beers by his friends
I have now slept with people from more countries than Ive actually visited. Can we make this a game somehow? Like foreign fuck buddy bingo?
I met her tumbling down the stairs chugging Captain Morgan. I'm not sure why she has the better reputation either.
she has an amazing ass but I need more beers to get past her horse face. It works out perfect becauseI can use her teeth as a bottle opener.
Just dont tell him. Tell him you colored your vagina for breast cancer awareness month. He will understand.
Please come home, i don't want to feel like basket garbage girl but I'm in your alleyway and not sure how to change that.
He asked if I could ever take him seriously, I told him I just like his doggy style.....needless to say I snuck out after an awkward cuddle session... I wont be calling him at 2 am anymore.
I have this rep as a wingman for a reason. I'm like a poon caddy. "You might want to use a 9 iron on this hole. "
Nothing says I'm committed to you for all eternity like letting him wear crocs to the wedding
DO NOT LET HIM TAKE CONTROL OVER YOUR BOWELS
Don’t drink the Bloody Mary - it’s vodka and salsa.
Randomize
