Was it cool?
About as cool as only getting a handjob on your honeymoon.
I just saw a kid walk into class with his dad. Fuck his life.
I just told my boyfriend I think I might be pregnant using Emoji icons....
which icon did you use to tell him he's not the father?
Turning 21 on Saint Patty's day. I like to think this is what my alcoholic ancestors have prepared me for
When i look at that picture of him, i'm a little proud to be like yeah, his dick was in my mouth saturday no big deal.
i am way too old to be getting fingered at work
I like to think I'd be good at dodging genitalia.
We met a guy named Raymond. You called him ramen all might and told him you would eat him up, "like sex, on a budget."
Seriously, this apartment is covered in body glitter. This chick musta been a huuuuuge slut. How do you get it across every surface?
Do you have any forwarding contact info?
So I don't know, I'm not a doctor, but I might be juggling dates with 3 different guys...
You need to stop telling people you gained weight over the holidays. You've been fat since July.
I have a bandage in my ass crack. In. My. Ass. Crack.
You can be responsible and still be on that ho life
I am talking to a naked lesbian about robots. I think this means I win life.
Can you dump a guy for having pierced nipples or is that shallow?
Randomize
