But if ***** wants to get filthy... Tell her to throw a text my way ;)
She tied me up with her honor cords...
Well, at first I was really confused. But then I realized that he was talking from his penis's perspective... in third person.
we used a swiffer mop as a stripper pole.
i love you man. i hope we fuck some serious shit up this summer.
I need to hump something and I know u understand.
right now I need to figure out a smart way to get an accurate picture of his dick so I know what in dealing with, right now in flying blind.
Had a burrito last night in your honor
That's the nicest thing you've ever done
It's 11:13am and my chem prof is drinking a beer in class. I guess finals week is stressful for them too
How long have I been using my debit card as a coaster?
Right as the plane left the gate the brownies kicked in. I dont think the guy next to me appreciated my engine noises as we took off
Sincerely. Thanks. You could have thought of anyone sitting on your face but you chose me. :)
but I'm still not sure how you became more and more fluent in Spanish the drunker you got
You have no concept of how high I am, do you?
Why is there never any toilet paper at his apartment? What does he wipe his ass with? WHAT DOES HE WIPE IT WITH?!?
Randomize
