okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
He can't get past my hymen. At least that's what he said it feels like.
I just realized that I've become that person they make the alcohol warnings on medicine for.
I could literally track my booty calls if I ever got knocked up by my parking tickets
God you better not be texting me after just having sex with someone from craigslist
Are we responsible for the snowmen doing it doggy-style in my front yard?
Thanks for putting pants on me last night. And for calling me a princess.
I was carrying him baywatch style into my place because he passed out.
Whoever was the last to get in from the chinese firedrill had to pay the dealer.
Woke her up in the middle of the night with the smell from a fart. So proud of my colon.
He is really real. Like I know where he works, have referenced him with mutual fb friends and I've seen his dick. He's real.
Are the transvestites working the counter tonight? Last time I was there they gave me love advice.
Im in my back seat in my own drive way with two beers left to shotgun and watching the sunrise. Am I over her yet?
I look at it as community service. He was going through a rough time and I gave him an ego boost. That's how we're going to remember it. I was doing a good deed lol
My shower turned into a bath, turned into me lying on the shower floor with the water running over me... That hung over..
Randomize
