none of my boyfriends are responding right now, I thought I had enough to avoid this problem
yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
kristin has been a bad kristin
I've been at work for less than an hour and have pooped twice already. That's what happens when you start sleeping with your roommate and don't want to use the bathroom at home anymore.
No better way to find a friend than to offer cyber sex and see what happens
This can't be good. I've realized that I weigh less in the morning after I have had a blackout drunk night than when I work out and eat healthy.
My night sucks. It's really hard to masturbate with a broken finger.
Thats why you have fulfilling relationships with nice girls and i have kinky sex with crazies
After you verbally abused the McDonalds employee for not making your fries fast enough, the fact that you woke up on a random lawn does not surprise me.
I went through my entire iTunes library and made a playlist called "Feelings". I have 7.5 hours of feelings.
I feel like my vagina was just in a fistfight.
Chugging this bottle of Jim at the airport is proving more difficult than I imagined. TSA is not amused.
Did you smoke and go to the aquarium again?
About to wash down a xan with an iced pumpkin spiced latte from starbs and I feel like I've never lived up to my stereotype so much at one time
Never let the horse trainer ride you, always ride the horse trainer. I have huge bruises on my thighs from his hip bones. That's how hard he rode me
Randomize
