just drove past a church sign that said "jesus got 'er done" ... welcome to the south
Thats the last time I go out drinking with my Irish friends. Two shots of flaming sambucca = bar on fire. I was only trying to high five the barman.
yeah. then i thought it would be a good idea to show them how hairy my armpits were, so they'd be distracted from the bush in my pants. EPIC FAIL.
you are the weird ass hat to my lady gaga
I found it funny that her boobs actually kinda felt like a bag of sand. the 40 year old virgin should feel better about himself.
I think when she wakes up, she'll either kill me, or laugh. I hope she laughs.
You fed me milk from the beer bong because you thought it would "Sober you up" .
You then proceeded to tell me how good of a cook you were and put raw cookie dough in the champagne.
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
Even worse we were making a sex tape so our reaction to the condom breaking was recorded.
That is was cool to fuck the single mother accross the street until every girl i bring home gets the car keyed.
Sorry about the picture of wills balls via snapchat last night btw
Hey I'm sorry for head butting you last night. Personally I thought it was funny at the time, but I can see how from your perspective it may not have been as enjoyable for you... Hope your lip is okay.
She has this wild look other eyes like she wouldn't be afraid to commit a felony.
we're so committed to being not committed
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