Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
Apparently when he woke up I was tripping my face off. Everytime the cat meowed I would meow back. This went on for several hours.
oh my god i am going to vomit. and little burgers wearing crowns are going to come out.
I just told someone i was in "addition and subtraction 160".......and they believed me.
I came over to his house for a party and realized I was quoted on the fridge... "How'd I get rug burn on my face?" And yes, my name was right next to it!
I swear they were about to hook up!!
I know because I was in the tub taking an imaginary silent bath. They stopped cuz I gagged on my shot.
I swear to god, if you fuck the hot one you're paying me back for the shot I just bought her
On a scale from 1 to the worst weekend of my life, that was an 11. I can see again, though.
Weird come down, just saw a woman on the train go to grab something and realised she had terrifying hands. They literally filled me with dread. I don't think I'm ok.
I pulled a muscle last night drunk dirty snapchatting him
I was struggling morally, but once I let go, I came pretty hard.
Masturbating with Lord of the Rings on was not how I planned my afternoon going but here I am.
How ya feelin' champ?
Like a million bucks that was soaked in alcohol.
Dude. Don't do acid and go to Disney on ice. Hear my warnings. That snow monster will fuck your shit up.
It's sunday night and I just went to the store to buy cookie dough and condoms, I'm so proud of myself.
Randomize
