lesson #67 learned in college: a three day old margarita, is still a margarita.
I left a cheeto on everyone's car trailing to the house i'm at, hanzel and gretel style.
I'm proud of our boobs and what they could potentially achieve in life.
Just saw the first guy I gave head to lose in the french open...some how I feel better that my mistake made it to the same mistake as our relationship, the third round. Don't judge.
there are two kinds of girls in this world: my mom, and sluts.
... was I dreaming when we did coke off of the xbox, or did that really happen?
I guess wearing a straight up bikini to class is an early indication that Thirsty Thursday has started.
wine lets you be on time to class apparently
This is a dangerous realization
I noticed a trail of vomit coming up the drive way. You must be home
On a toatally unrelated note, I see music in my hair
Weekend plan is a big bag of dope, delivery food, Bollywood marathon and masterbating my dick raw.
This is my punishment for trynna have a festive time with a stranger. I always forget you can't get weird with one night stands
I was supposed to go on a date tonight but I cancelled because I found out the Lizzie McGuire movie is on Netflix.
You tore a poster off a lamppost and ATE IT. That drunk.
just bought safety googles to wear so he can cum on my face and not in my eye. SAFETY FIRST!
Randomize
