we were watching porn and trying to copy the position they were doing now i think my hip is dislocated
He passed out drunk on top of me. Fully erect. Still inside me. Woke up like 1 minute later, and continued.
he said that he wanted to outsmoke the rain, I don't know what that means but I'm gonna go help him
Please don't drown this weekend. It would be a shame to lose a dick like yours.
you came out with your cock in between the legs of a balloon animal. Maybe she'll think you have a sense of humor.
What kind of balloon animal was it?
I made out with a guy because he was sitting on my coat...
Gina was bawling her eyes out and then she ran into the street and peed. she kept screaming "LOOK WHAT YOUVE DONE TO ME"
The only thought that went through my head was "that would be an absolute disaster" so of course I said yes
I could not actually bring myself to utter the phrase "donkey cock" in front of my father. Not possible.
its like i had a thought but i dont know what the words are for it
we were sitting in the kitchen and you kept biting my shoulder saying "itll all be over soon"
I legit had a 15 minute convo about dinosaurs with a guy at the bar last night cuz he was wearing a jurassic park shirt
I'm about to take my 7th shot and I have to to go to dinner with my grandma in an half hour. What is my life.
He handed me a beer to drink as he went down on me. I want to keep him
And he put my hair in my clip while i blew him...and he did a good job
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