Nipple clamps can be ambiguous
you proceeded to suck on ur pinkie saying it reminded you of chris and you wanted him badly
her underwear stopped being sexy when i saw her pubes sticking out of the top.
I wrote and sealed my mom's mothers day card last night while intoxicated.. should i put it in the maibox
without a question
apparently he couldn't remember my name so he refereed to me as whats-her-boobs and everyone knew that it was me he was talking about
I positioned my bed perfectly so around 10 a.m. every morning there are rays of sunshine coming through the window in my room. Now i can tan while PTFO.
Dude I wanna go on a booze cruise
Dude our life is a booze cruise
But without boats...
before the moonshine you were already braiding the bouncers beard -_-
Might I also add after my boss threw up in the garbage can and yelled puking rally, he dougied, then told me I wasn't about that life.
I just really hate taking care of things... If I can't fill it with liquor I'm not sure what to do with it.
That awkward moment when your boyfriend tries to have sex with his go pro on #hdporn
So I've reached a new low. After completing my walk of shame and being told "see you around", I took off my heels to discover he had came in my shoe.
She just started crying. With my dick still inside her. Something about her grandpa.
Im eating leftover Easter ham in a bubble bath. What has my life come to?
outside on the street drinkin, walked into a random house and asked to pee, some kid hands me a beer and says i have to chug it first
Randomize
