Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
Omg I def was not. I wasn't that drunk. I showed that I stuff my bra but I didn't whip my tit out.
I feel dirty and I went home alone. Bars should be like airlines and make fat girls pay double for everything.
I cant remeber how long i've been laying here...it could be 10 minutes to a fucking day
There are not one, but two women wearing my boxers on the couch right now. You need to wake the fuck up.
at least he left the skimmer on the side of the pool so i could fish out my thong in the morning
I don't think my arm is broken I can still text
Left my card at the bar and had a drunk girl climb on the hood of my running car to scream at me.
Overall win. We all know who got to sleep on the concrete outside of Denny's with you.
I'm not so good at organized events that don't revolve around whiskey or playgrounds.
I did a hand stand against the glass wall at Ziggy's with no panties on and got 3 phone numbers. Thank God I shaved this morning...
I found her face down on the kitchen floor asking anybody who walked by for Kraft Dinner
Just Peed in a cup for my country. Fighting the good fight.
He is a beautiful butterfly covered in tattoos and naked.
If he isn’t into CosPlay he will be after tonight. That naughty nurse outfit heals broken hearts
Randomize
