My whole home page is your drunken face booking, congrats.
I just had the fat girl at the party come tell me I look sad and offer me a beer. I'm out.
That's it, I refuse to live in a world where sparkly vampires beat Batman at anything.
I'm going to replace you with a friend who will be happy when I find a huge penis
You were with some girl. Your exs best friend. Your shirt was half undone and she was telling you to put your penis away. It wasn't out but you wanted to. Patron is your weaknes.
Sober me is really good at getting to the airport on time. Drunk me is really good at shitting my pants. Do you know how much pants cost at the airport????
It got heated then she just left and I was all alone in the women's restroom.
Your mother liked my album on facebook that's only filled with drunk pictures. I don't know what to feel about this
My neighbors are white girl rapping to Hamilton again...
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
I'm trying to cause a divorce, your hooking up with a felon, I think we need Jesus.
Nice people suck dick too. I'm proof.
I was just seen throwin up on the bookstore building near a trashcan by parents. Naturally I throw a thumbs up and say go college
I remember waking up on the bathroom floor and seeing my teeth behind the toilet
"Offered to eat Froot Loops out of my belly button" drunk. Thats how drunk.
Randomize
