dude, the summer is killing me. i just woke up cause my balls were stuck to HER leg!
Peed on my phone. Dried it out in oven. Technology is both a plus and a minus.
I am going to get arrested. I am yelling fuck repeatedly, wearing a Bird jersey and polka dot pants while pounding wine. Amazing mug shot to follow.
You would think that someone would have been sober enough to object to vodka bong races.
Please get rnbert tn get chebk h'm in i'm no dead when he getr gome
I figured you left because I was a shit show. Were you still there when I got locked in the bathroom and didn't know where I was? If not, that could have been a dream. I'm still not sure.
Sitting on an airplane reeking of booze, sex and shame while surrounded by families coming home from Disney. This is not one of my finer moments.
I'm so hungover all I can do is stare at my curser and hope it starts moving on its own
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
Your grammar in that last text message was so awful.. My vagina wants to go crawl in a hole, and never speak to you again.
I got pushed into some bald man in the pit and spent the next few minutes with my face against his head. Man I love ecstasy.
Dude just texted me asking if I could drive 45 mins for a quickie dude use your hand
its not like i called off work either time for the purpose of tripping, it was more like well, i have nothing to do now today, there is acid and im only human.. but twice
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
well i can officially check "have sex in a prius" off my bucket list...
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