ok i said sorry. what else do you want?
100 blowjobs
He cooked the food on a paper plate in the oven.
Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
What drug did you take that made the cabinets scream at you?
There's a group of australian girls next to me. can't take them seriously. think they are going to turn into mr g
she walked out and i tried to get her to come back but i couldn't remember her name so i just whistled... future reference: that doesn't work
her spring break bucket list included "break into The Swamp, blow him where Tebow has Tebowed"
I just had the stunning realization that I lost my virginity in a bunk bed.
Getting haircut. The stylist asked about the body paint dried in my hair. I told her there was prob glitter, too. It was a fun night!
I miss you, too. It's hard to sleep without anything licking my head.
I have no idea what those words in that order meant, but if you go to Florida send me pics of strippers
Also he didn't buy condoms after we ran out last week. Luckily I had one, but I told him he should be more optimistic about getting laid
I mean, he drove your car and it burst into flames, if anyone cant be trusted, it's him.
He's at Disney with 4 kids and I'm drinking wine from the bottle in bed at 2:45pm. Does it sound like we're compatible??
Vegas never ceases to amaze me. Hung out with a stripper from ATL all night and got nuthin, but the next night meet a bride-to-be who gives me a bj in the elevator.
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