What the hell am I supposed to do with 50 gallons of mayo?
I just got called an ass for saying no thanks to a Greenpeace solicitor. I don't want the whales to die but I do want Greenpeace to fail. Conundrum.
do you know anything about the $5 bill with my name stapled to it in my purse??
I have a drinking game planned. Were gunna watch empire records. Everytime they say rex manning we have to take a shot
He was on Keeping Up with the Kardashians it was like a deed from god to bang him
most of the afternoon was spent sneaking around my house and alternating which bathrrom to throw up in.
Do you ever actually plan things? Or is it always drugs then whatever happens? I'm considering being worried about you
Ive already seen two fights and a clown urinating in the middle of the street. Hello Halloween 2014.
Go have fun. I'm gonna go shower off the regret.
If she gets mad at me, that only means more free time for me. I like to put myself I win win situations. Despite being in a relationship, I still find ways to accomplish my goals.
It's not even noon and I've had 3 people call me a savage, one of them said it in reference to the blow job I gave them. So I guess you could say it's going to be a good weekend
it wasnt weird until his dog watched upclose as i put a tampon in
"You can have sex in my class, just stay quiet. I don't like noise." My professor... Shall make for an interesting semester.
He stopped mid sex to say he was sorry that he couldn't make us work.continued. Stopped again to ask if it was crazy that he loved me.
That is not what no strings attached sex is about.
God, I missed his penis.
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