super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
"Whiskey Cheerios" was a terribly great idea.
I apparently texted him "since you're taking time out to think about us. You probably need to think about me getting arrested right now."
At beerfest, hammered, going to try to not get naked in public but i cant make any promises
apparently i was cut off before i even walked in
We need to pull ourselves out of this slump. We need dick and lots of it. We are going to fuck our way to happiness.
It was pathetic and I was covered in butter
Remind me again why a vodka watermelon can't be a thanksgiving dish
Yeah. You can ask him out. We're just fuck buddies. My vagina will be sad but your heart can be happy.
I was giving this guy head and he stopped me to look me in the eyes and say "you have a gift"
The bad news is tonight is also a blue moon, ergo, latin, I will have to get 'once in a blue moon' drunk which I feel is significantly more dangerous than IPO drunk
It's not that he's ugly its just that being blind folded makes everything less awkward
My mom just said "okay girls, the ONLY thing i ask is that you stay sober Saturday afternoon, until halfway through lunch. And you don't wear that crystal camo hat. This is a funeral, not a tailgate party"
Best wishes.
Does fucking him in the back of the car with the sun roof retracted count as star gazing?
sober me doesnt really want him anymore, but when drunk me takes over, she might want him, and god only knows the shit that might happen with drunk me.
Randomize
