I thought it was weird that her dad told me to finish and get out after he walked in on us. I like him
im learning from these one night stands last time i came in her this time i came on her AND deleted every contact in her phone!
I had a dream that I had 21 friend requests. it was the best day
we were boning in the bathroom when her boyfriend came upstairs. I wish i could remember what happened next more clearly, because it had to have been hilarious
She literally crushed my balls between her butt cheeks. It was both the greatest and worst thing ever. Dancers are awesome.
He found my weave.. Think he'll still fuck me Friday? And how do I ask for it back?
Confession: Sometimes I wear my stolen scrubs to the corner store because people will think I'm a doctor and not just a girl too lazy to change out of her pajamas.
It feels like one of my ribs evaporated.
So maybe putting the blacklight above the futon wasn't the best idea...
It just wouldn't be valentines day if i didn't invite 90% of the guys i've slept with to go to the strip club with me
Did he ask you why you were in his back yard Sunday night?
I'm currently giving my drug dealer relationship advice. He's a nice guy and all but I'm really just hoping I get some free weed
for some reason leaving your socks onmakes it less meaningful.
Please clarify that he is speaking of beer pong and not rough sex
For someone who wanted a break I'm getting way to much dick
Randomize
