So, it's like build-a-bear for your vag?
week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
so, the parking garage attendent caught us humping in the car. long story short, we have free parking whenever we want! take that abstinence.
You make shower sex sound like waterboarding
You're putting the star player on the bench. You dont put Michael Jordan on the bench.
Are you referring to my vagina as Michael Jordan?
Also was told that I was her "third favourite booty call" - I'm taking this a good thing right?
It's a podium place so yeah...
I came in and she was laying on the ground just stoking it saying "the floor is where our feet step"
I was gonna start crying but as he was asking me for my info i saw him eyeing my rack. So I sorta started pushing them together. He asked me to get out of the car he made me turn around so he could check me out and then he said and I quote "okay ma'am. Everything is fine, I'm going to let you off with a warning. Next time if you're not wearing yoga pants you might not be as lucky" I am blessed.
"Masturbate" is an actual item on an actual ToDo list of mine. It is at the top.
Named all the presidents in order between puke sessions while semi conscious so that's a thing I can do now
Thanks for fingering me to orgasm during Wu-Tang Clan
She broke up with me. I guess I was in the most chaste lesbian relationship in the history of the world and had no idea.
Best news I’ve heard all day. Cookies and dick. What more could a girl ask for?
I have easymac and six pack of beer. This night can't get any better.
He's a security blanket. A security blanket who FUCKS.
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