office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
Just chased the kids into the backyard with kitchen knives. Best. Babysitters. Ever.
He tried to blame not having a condom on the economy.
I just wanted to yell " i am not a shake weight!!"
do you wanna get some fucking pussy tonight.....THEN DRESS LIKE IT
For future reference, when you see people who look like Rosie O'donell, do not tell them they look like Rosie O'donell.
what kind of wine goes with anal sex and shame?
DO NOT GO IN OUR BATHROOM. it cannot be unseen
You showed up to your dad's bday dinner late, dirty, and hungover then proceeded to yell at the bartender for trying to take advantage of you by putting extra bourbon in your drink... Highly doubt you win best daughter award.
Shut the fuck up. It's not the end of the world. Now come get your asshole bleached with me or we're not roommates anymore.
What part of don't open in front of your kids didn't you understand? Astroglide, magnums, fuzzy handcuffs and a blindfold are going to be hard to explain as friends presents.
Is it okay to thank someone for the orgasms they gave you, even though they weren't with you?
you got drunk, told him he looked like shaggy and said 'I wouldn't show you my mystery machine for all the scooby snacks in the world'
all I remember the next morning was crawling through the doggy door and finding my underwear in my purse
His dick has the same name as my pipe. I'm keeping him forever.
Randomize