remind me not buy ky at kmart ever again. Had to get a manager to open the locked case. then he stood there and watched me look through the selection
I hate that ur telling me this.
I'm about to cry with happyness at the beer that will be consumed
what is the aproppriate waiting time between having sex and playing super Mario brothers
6 min
I lost control in the snow and hit a parked car. I went into our building to get a pen and paper to leave a note and when I came back the car was gone and there was a hot girl there. I used the pen and paper to get her number.
Oh my god! She wrote the word ''hi'' in HAIR on the shower wall. What the fuck?!
Just woke up to my stoned boyfriend building a shrine around my bare ass. He'll never leave me.
I just discovered the Reese's pieces and sourdough bread sandwich. No signs of coming down.
The really sad thing is that I actually practiced crawling in my room yesterday in preparation for today
He knows my period schedule but not my work schedule.
Fuck your 100 proof Hot Damn. Do you know what 100 proof vomit tastes like? Anger.
Yes. I am out of condoms. I kept filling them with glow paint and playing with them when I was on mushrooms, which resulted in me having unprotected sex last weekend
I frew up on some kids lovely sidealk chald drawings..
I wish I just waited long enough to hate someone to fuck one
Just calm down. My foot long super joint and I will be over shortly.
Fucked a DJ on a jetski today... I love florriidaaa!
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