Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she can't stop having the shits.
why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
I was going to clean my house but wine sounded better
No, I'm not keeping her! I can't become an adulterer and a dog stealer in the same 24 hours...
Dude. Hurry up. They just blessed the tequila.
I was just compiling a top 5 blowjobs list and that's in there for sure.
hes the hot one from work who thought i was dead after my party
Any formal decision about whether we're planning to objectify naked women with daddy issues tonight?
I call it a party but only because that sounds better than 8 people getting drunk around a pool.
I hopped in a random dudes car outside the strip club at 3pm on a Sunday and said "Follow that car!"
I always make inappropriate sexual decisions during the holidays
Im gnna go loik fir my newq gay friuend now
Goodbee
she kind of stumbled up and said "Bitches be needin' stiches." i thought i could convince her to break a bottle over someones head but she fell onto her face and passed out before i could say anything
I know that whole thing was awkward. Not worth the piece of cake.
Please tell me that nice older woman you're with at the bar is not your comp&lit professor.
Randomize
