I woke up 25 minutes ago and have been high for 20. Impressive?
He just walked into my room in a robe with a cooking pot of cereal.
She tried to sleep on the front steps of her salon so she wouldn't be late for work and these people put her in a cab to my house. She is nothing if not responsible. Can u imagine her boss finding her there this morning?
Employee of the year! :)
I think it's awesome that you're getting shower sex advice from a Mormon.
You have no idea how pumped I am. I literally plan on dying. You're in my will
At what point in life does one make the conscious decision to incorporate capes into everyday life? Like, as a fashion statement?
I'm not sure how to answer that. Is it a general question or one you're wondering about for yourself? Because I don't think you're there yet.
I'm beginning to worry that I seem to get along best with people when I'm naked with them.
If I don't have tequila in my hand soon, I'm going to have to violate human rights laws
Just took adderall with about half a bottle of red wine...i have stopped trying for this last exam
I threw up a lot of peanut butter last night.
I also woke up in a guys bed in a Reptar shirt yesterday morning staring at a movie theater sized poster of the not as popular Air Bud franchise movie Super Buddies.
MESSY REBOUND SEX HERE I COME! Time to start stretching to fit in my back seat again ...
It makes me feel all patriotic & free... And borderline diabetic.
Worst wingman u don't do ANYTHING but laugh at my incompitant shyness
I asked what it takes to be a good delivery driver, my new boss said "always keep these in your vehicle" as he handed me a flashlight and a blunt. I'm going to like this job.
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