in the practice room. just found 3 bottles of smirnoff hidden inside the piano. SO glad i didn't get into berklee...
I feel like she's the kind of girl who always ends up with guys who have oddly shaped dicks..
Just woke up with three stitches in my left boob. Nevertheless, I think I'm going to like this school.
I need a second opinion on who's blood is in my car.
We did nothing beneficial to ourselves, or our country last night.
Well, i'm not sure how that works so i wish both you and your vagina luck on your voyage.
So I met my girlfriends dad last night. Or should I say I re-met that mall cop that had to tackle me.
How was the party? Lets put it this way: "He wants her dick" was a factual sentence stated last night.
So my mind was like YOU ARE TOTALLY GONNA MAKE IT TO CLASS TODAY but then my body was all LOL NO YOU AIN'T.
FOund a bunch of old fireworks spring cleaning.
Who is our new insurance provider?
Those were some damn good pancakes you made last night.
Dude I've been in FL since Monday.
Just had hot animal sex with the guy who had been sending me 10 second selfie snapchats for the past month
It's a sad day when you're not really phased by the McChicken video only because you've seen weirder porn.
I think I may have just hit a new slutty low! ..... Just purchased the Costco pack of condoms... $9.99/48 pack = amazing deal! The judgement when I bust out the value pack = priceless!!!
Sorry I missed your birthday party. I caught a dick and rode it to O-Town
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