nothing tight i'm going to stuff myself with food and alchy
it doesn't get any better than taco bell and soft core porn
her nipple to breast ratio was just odd
I think my penis got bigger when i lost weight
I came out of bedroom with my jeans on backwards, zipped AND buttoned. I have inconceivable talents whilst intoxicated.
Just lit a joint with steel wool and a 9 volt battery... thank you 3rd grade science class
Its alot easier to hide alcohol when your wearing a toga..
everythings easier when your wearing a toga.
A French guy bit my cheek. Is that sexy there? Also had to threaten to stab the bus driver. I'm not sure I like Europe.
They're frat boys at heart and have sickly, dusty, rotting souls.
So I almost just died there. And we need a new garage door.
She had an asthma attack and had to stop but insisted on getting me off. It's official she's the one
Oh, in response to your "does dating get better" question...I feel like penises are getting smaller nowadays. Its been several years since I saw a good 8+ incher.
It's decided. Tomorrow I'm getting a Big Mac and a Dildo
As your boyfriend, I'm gonna congratulate you on winning that fist fight. But as a cop, I have to tell you to not do that again.
i only got to wear my halloween costume for an half hour before it got taken off.
Randomize
