I'm drinking on the job... HEAVILY
I had to remind him that there is no "age exchange rate" between the u.s. and spain, and that 16 will always equal 16
Our relationship just reached the stage where i can touch her boobs while making a honking noise without getting hit in the face
well seeing as i got a call at 5 am from the hotel manager telling me my cousin was passed out on the lobby floor...not good
I already apologized. And I got cum in my eye in return, I say your night beats mine...
She is high at the bar - she thinks the bottle of frangelico is aunt jemima telling her to stop doing drugs.
I walked in and you were laying on the floor bleeding everywhere half asleep half crying and moe was at the kitchen table eating frozen pizza refusing to acknowledge you. What a sight.
At one point I thought we were going to have to fuck our way out of their apartment
Why did you send me 12 pictures in a row of your expressionless face at 2:30 am?
I still have your make up all over the inside of my thighs from the face sitting. Free tonight?
I think I blacked out after I decided drinking alone on the trailered jetskis was a good idea
FYI the blow job was for papa johns pizza
I regret 8000% nothing
Tried to shave my legs but the rug burn on my knees from last night got in the way.
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
Homeboy just asked me to strip for him. He should not be this horny and allowed to be in Vegas with his kid.
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