I definitely ripped a mole off of her back in the process
Its the Friday before break. There are 20 kids in my 300 person lecture hall. All with the same what the fuck am I doing here look on there face.
That's what you get for fucking someone nicknamed "wiggle worm"
We were fucking on his hammock and right as he came we flipped over. I landed on him, he landed on a pile of pinecones. We're done with nature sex.
I believe some people would call last night an orgy.
thanks for being my moral compass. and thanks for not always pointing north so i can be slutty and not feel bad about it.
My roommate says its rare that you can be tear gassed before you lose your virginity so i feel accomplished in life
Trust me. I don't get home before 5am. I know what Immmm doing. BTW bail money is in my closet. PEACE
So last night I learned something new. Whenever I drink beer out of a bottle a random guy buys me another one. It was like as soon as the glass hit my lips every guy in a 20ft radius got a hard on.
Oh yea... In other news I've decided to get an external hard drive and start getting music from all the guys I'm fucking... Do you think a terabyte would be enough storage space?
Then you bent down and whispered, "excuse me mr. Stair, could you please stop moving?"
I am disappointed by everyone's lack of ability to dance on a stripper pole:(
I just want to eat Taco Bell and throw it up on his doorstep.
My boobs are hoarders, they steal food and hide it. Greedy bitches.
I'm peeing on your house...you up?
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