Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
I have to decide between the hot young blond with no apparent gag reflex, and the brunette with a great ass and a trust fund.
I think I tried picking up these girls last night by asking them what their favorite color was...I obviously woke up alone
I'm not saying we can't have sex tonight, I'm just saying we have to work it around Lost.
Oh my god my life; so much cake and so little sex
We are lost. Everyone is drunk and it all went downhill after we iced the bus driver.
Everyone else in class agrees the weed smell is coming from me
apparently they stopped looking at spit swabs under the microscope in bio ever since they found a sperm cell in one students sample
Human centipede...with the teletubbies. That's what my nightmare had in it.
I don't even want to know.
if i don't get grease into my system pronto i will undoubtedly die
I ate 1200 calories worth of chocolate covered marshmallows and googled why it is okay to be single forever
I'm pretty sure I hallucinated the existence of an entire human being last night.
In my life time, I want nothing more than to get a blow job while watching Space Jam.
When I woke up today i said I will NOT sleep with her. This morning I did the walk of shame into work wearing the same clothes... How was your Monday?
Last night we proved the theory that "harder" is the worst rough sex safe-word ever.
Randomize
