Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
nothing screams I HAVE A PROBLEM! like the case of miller lite sitting on top of my DUI papers in the passenger seat of my car. lol
its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
There comes a time in every girls life when she must use her boobs for good instead of evil.
Your pregnant arnt you
I was handcuffed to a girl for half-an-hour. And I'm still the only one in the house who didn't get laid.
So i forgot that my head is completely wrapped in gauze, and tried to do the "come hither" look. He think's i'm brain damaged
When a girl says " I never would have come over if I knew I was getting kicked out at 7am." the correct response isn't "but think of how responsible you're being."
She kept talking about how amazing the banana she had yesterday was. Don't know if it was innuendo, stoned, or just a really amazing banana.
Getting my nails done with Diana... I'm going for the keep your friends close and the girl who's dating the guy you want to fuck closer
I think the solution to your phobia is an open relationship with your dildo. about the same responsibility as a pet rock
So do you know how we found out he was engaged?
An Amber Alert?
If we try hard enough and believe in ourselves, we can still make it to Wendy's before they close
it was the most awkward makeout ever. it was record breaking really
...i feel like you have a lot of those.
My orgasm happened in two different decades
then he said the sex was mediocre and that it was because of me. and that we could try again tomorrow.
it was 100% mediocre because of him, and we will 100% not be trying again tomorrow.
Randomize
