Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
So I just introduced myself to this guy in front of me and now he's saving my pictures on facebook to his phone..
Listen, Pinot Grigio got me pregnant. It can get you a boyfriend.
There's a level of bonding between people at the liquor store at 10:30 in the morning that's unrivaled
Don't ever tell me I'm a bad friend. I woke up at 7 this morning to drive your mistake home because you wouldn't get up.
He would only do it doggy style. The "he's probably gay" debate rages on...
as of this morning I have officially vommed on the highways of 6 different countries. It's a proud moment.
Free tacos and bad night are never used in the same sentence
I feel like I missed the land of milk and honey and instead wound up in the land of beer and pizza. And yet, I think I'm happier here.
I changed his name in my phone to "Irrelevant" last night. Not changing it back.
he called me ma'am when we were fucking last night...he's five years older than me. I think I'm in love.
If there was a gecko involved in your BDSM I'm gonna have to request that not happen when we live together ;)
Took an adderall for the first time in a few weeks. Spent 45 minutes peeling an orange TO PERFECTION.
Good for you, kid with a beer in hand as you walk to your 11 am class.
I thought this was a dry campus.
That means you have to bring your own beer from home.
There are flour footprints all over the house. Either u guys are trying to pull that Paranormal Activity shit on me again, or u got drunk and tried to make pancakes.
Randomize
