i just ordered a pitcher of margaritas for me and a friend but she called and canceled. oh well, looks like im getting trashed alone.
the waiter who hardly speaks english told me "i go get your medicine now"
this medicine is soooo good.
windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
Seriously. Doesn't matter if I went out last night, work is like crafts class w.a side of facebook
She didn't know my name but she knew I was Canadian so she just called me Canada. It sounded like the national anthem when we were fucking.
He doesn't like you, he likes u not having a gag relfex
When he left he said something to the effect of "well now that I've been used..." I think he may be on to me.
life lesson #151: dont let people go batshit crazy and stab you in the knee
i will live by this rule
Need to spend sober time with him while fully clothed. I can't decide if he's a seriously amazing man or a complete fucking dickbag.
This is me not judging you for what a fine line you draw between the two.
this old dude from the bar is giving me a ride home in a van, his bumper sticker says " don't laugh your kids could be in here" scary world ou here
so she gave me back a bag of clothing, had some boxers in it...they werent mine.... well that sums up 5 years of my life
There's a stripper getting there at 10 though so hopefully I'm out before the stripper gets there. I don't have time to deal with a stripper.
I don't think I bit anyone but I woke up to scrapes knees, bruises and new friends.
Come on, will you just fuck him so we can watch Star Wars.
dollar rum and cokes, see you on the dark side of infinity
I talked to his mom for a good 10 minutes with coke all over my nose. Not the best first impression
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