Broke my phone, have no voice AND I was blackout by 3 p.m...I'm betting I had a great time.
32 messages asking me to suck his dick. And there for a minute i thought i was desperate. ha!
Hahahaha
make that 40.
No, I was feeling sad because all of the other girls were like model-skinny. But then I remembered that I had big boobs and went to hit on their boyfriends.
Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
We've finally become those guys who you'd see in middle school when you went to the park who are just stoned out of their minds sitting on the swings.
You're so wise. You're like my sexual Grandmother Willow.
At least the cops kept you away from sleeping with her. Protect and Serve.
You now know someone who has just successfully talked his way out of being arrested for breaking into the town library at midnight. Ive been home for too long.
Ok. So I've woke up in a hospital. New thing to top that.... Waking up and realizing you've been locked inside the bar by urself at 430 am and all the doors are locked by key
You just sat there and yelled "I JUST WANT TO RUB MY NIPPLES"
On a scale of zero to "unmitigated disaster," how drunk is he?
I mean I only got hit in the ass with ONE firework
I'll say this one last time. You are TWENTY FIVE YEARS OLD. You are not going to die alone and this is not the twilight of your life. Stop taking shrooms on your period!!!!
Would you like to get a drink then hook up or reverse order I don't really care. Hopefully you can keep this between us.
on one hand I spent like $120 last night..on the other that was the best sex of my life
Randomize
