the bus pole looks like a man who feels guiltyty about something
can we please move this conversation out of my vagina?
Lost is over, my longest committed relationship is coming to an end.
We are gonna be 90 years old in wheelchairs at the nursing home sitting at computers poking each other and waiting for the other to die so we will have the last facebook poke.
why would you automatically assume i'm high...
you just told me you're eating the powder of a lemonade mix.
Hey. Me and my buddy are drunk. you wanna give us tattoos of the hawaiian punch guy we shall pay very well. Seriously dude. no bull shit.
My bed is full of blood and feathers
I just masturbated and watched youtube makeup videos, which was just an extension of masturbation.
Why does 2015 have to start with so many regrets?
First thing I find in the car I just pick up from my grandpa? A discount card for the strip club down the road from his apartment. The force is still strong.
can i get licensed in dentistry online like a priest
He is a sex God. It lasted more than an hour, and I don't remember how many times I came. I lost count at 57.
He and I didn't so much date, as watch cartoons and go down on each other.
So I sniffed too hard this morning before work and I THINK THE COCAINE JUST STARTED ROUND 2.
just because i'm not a monk anymore doesn't mean I need to tell you about my new sex life.
which is fantastic by the way.
Randomize
