Apparently at one point I was wearing my sweatshirt backwards like it was normal and then I threw up into the hood. Never drinking again.
have you ever noticed that homeless people never have acne. suck it proactive
i have a real life question, do ur boyfriends pretend to be vampires ever?
Listen, this was just a tiny lapse of judgement.
I'm pretty sure that's not a synonym for pregnancy.
but you don't have to sleep on top of four different cum stains because you'd rather buy a case of Franzia than spend $3.50 in the student laundry room
So the bar isnt gonna put that broken window on my tab. appaerently they want cash
I've learned something. I regret way too may Tuesdays in my life to be normal
just woke up to a get well card i wrote myself when i was drunk. it was by the advil. i am a cocky bitch.
well apperantly i passed out on the stairs shouting "victory".
Stripper pole. Sore legs. More vaca money.
What ever happened to the whole 'innocent until proven guilty' thing. Like 'not pregnant until proven pregnant'. That's how it should be...
The bachelorette started when I opened the door and they threw a few dozen dildos at me.
Yeah I don't remember how I got home last night
Judging from my pants, I embarrassed myself smh
They need to eat meat, go down on me the first time, every time, and know how to pull my hair. And there's a height requirement for this ride
I'm a history major and he's the descendant of TWO presidents. Did you really think I wasn't going to sleep with him?
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