I just am on my way home.. i had 3 and one startd crying and puking.. so they went home. one bitch fuckin ruined it for evryone.. u playin cards?
Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
I just accidently tagged myself in the picture of the 16 year olds spreading their legs in bikinis. Failure.
If we keep treating our bodies like amusement parks we have another 10 years left at best.
She just sent me videos of her blowing my little bro and my best friend... worst. ex. ever.
He tried to cuddle with me after we hooked up and i just looked at him and said why are you still here?
I didn't hate myself when I woke up today, that's improvement right?
I come back upstairs and she's leaning over sink full of vomit saying 'oh my god it's the chili'
This girl came outta nowhere yelling HOLD MY DICKKKKKK!
YES please come visit. Lets go get belligerent. I won't even pepperspray you
He told me he needed "space" but then goes and likes my insta of panacakes.. Done.
Yes. He better. Or I will shave a penis into his beard while he sleeps.
Do u ever find yourself high af, watching American ninja warrior and crying at the athletes stories?
It got weird I got a phone call while looking at porn and the video started playing while on the phone full on porn audio.
She put her coat on went to leave and called me an asshole. I responded with "I never said I wasn't" and then she pounced on me like a cat on cat nip.
Randomize
